tv The Late Show With Stephen Colbert CBS February 5, 2016 11:35pm-12:38am PST
our next newscast is tomorr morning at 4-30. late show with stephen colbert is next. >> stephen colbert! ♪ ♪ ( band playing intro music ) >> stephen: thank you. thank you. ( cheers and applause ) captioning sponsored by cbs welcome to "the late show." thanks, everybody. thank you, thank you, sir. thank you! >> stephen! stephen! stephen!
stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! >> stephen: hey! thanks so much! welcome to "the late show." i'm stephen colbert. a couple weeks ago-- thank you so much. i don't know, friday night, wonderful to be here on friday night. thank you so much for being here. a couple of weeks ago, if you guys watch the show on a regular basis-- do you guys watch the show? ( cheers and applause ). >> stephen: that's good to know. i told you a few weeks ago, scifts at cambridge university said it was scientifically impossible for spider-man to walk on walls. i believe it was a ph.d. thesis on destroying my childhood. why do you want to hurt me, cambridge? why destroy my dreams? ( laughter ) given a scalpel, you would dissect a rainbow.
( laughter ) that was hard. that was hard to read. ( cheers and applause ) that was hard to read. it was almost as disappointing as when they realized that study proving that, for hawkman to fly like a bird, he would also have to poop like one. i'm just saying, batman, be careful where you park the batmobile. and definitely put the top up. here is the spider-man situation. the peter parker party poopers at cambridge claim someone man-sized can't get enough adhesion on a wall to climb it. with hands this size. the largest animal capable of climbing a wall, they say, is a geko. come on! who wants to be rescued by gecko man? "i have saved you from the green goblin. now i will save you 15% on car insurance." ( laughter ) ( applause )
( cheers and applause ) no! but i have just received some hopeful news. the superheroes at stanford university in the states just sent me this: >> so, colbert, i was watching your show on thursday, and you said something about spider-man not being able to climb walls. now, here at stanford, we had an issue with that because, if you don't just copy the gecko but instead you're clever about how you distribute your weight, you can use a device like this, and a human can climb a glass wall. >> stephen: that's right. spider-man could be real because stanford has created spider-man gloves to scale a building. let's take a look at stanford's amazing web-slinger in action! there he is. there he is. ( laughter ) ♪ spider-man,
♪ spider-man, ♪ does whatever this appears to be ♪ criminals, you are on notice. spider-man is going to bring you to justice! just stay on the second floor and give him about an hour and 20 minutes. you're on your honor! he's coming! ( cheers and applause ) cha-ping. ting! thank you, stanford. keep sticking it to those knuckleheads at cambridge. oh, my "late show" sense is tingling because we've got a great show for you tonight! ( cheers and applause ) is that what that is? >> jon: not one, two. >> stephen: first, i'll be sitting down with bobby cannavale.
( cheers and applause ) his new show, "vinyl," is about the new york music scene in the '70s. it was pretty wild. imagine the hard rock cafe, but with no chicken fingers. then, we're going to take a look at the greatest super bowl ads of all time with advertising legend donny deutsch. ( applause ) you are going to want to stay through all my commercials to see these commercials. plus, we'll hear music from singer-songwriter charles kelley. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ ♪ ticktock, ticktock, ticktock. that's jon basteeft and the stay human dancers, everybody. say hi, y'all! ( cheers and applause ) >> jon: get down!
( cheers and applause ) that's my super hero fish man. his only power when he's not in the water is to flop. this band is about to play that secret note that starts the show. but before they do, one more thing: ohio governor john kasich has pledged to reunite pink floyd if he is elected president. but he is also against legalizing pot, so he does not want you to enjoy them. >> tonight, stephen welcomes actor bobby cannavale. advertising legend donny
deutsch. and a musical performance by charles kelley. featuring jon batiste and stay human. and now it's time for "the late show with stephen colbert"! ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: hey! hey, everybody! thank you so much. >> stephen! stephen! stephen! stephen! >> stephen: thank you so much! you know what? ( cheers and applause ) that's amazing energy. i know, you cannot beat these friday crowds like the one we have tonight. ( cheers and applause ) because-- you can't beat them.
because as i said before it is friday night. and we definitely did not pretape this thursday so we could have extra time to prepare for our special live show right after the super bowl on sunday. i'll prove it right now. audience, is it friday? ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: and as you know, every friday, we set up hypothetical battles between two persons, places or things. it could be anything, like pen versus sword. the '64 cleveland browns versus 2014 boston pops. a horse-sized duck versus horse-sized horse. then we post those match-ups as twitter polls and let you, the people, decide who would win the battle. so get your gloves out and put them on your thumbs. it's time for... >> "friday night fights!"
( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: welcome to "friday night fights!" now, folks. ( cheers and applause ) everybody loves "friday night fights." first up, as we do every week first, let's check the results from last friday when i debated two classic match-ups with astrophysicist neil degrasse tyson. neil, thanks for coming back to face the music. ( cheers and applause ) good to see you. all right, neil. brace yourself. our first fight pitted feline flake tycoon, tony the tiger, versus legume dandy, mr. peanut. neil, you sided with mr. peanut, but twitter has spoken and the
winner was tony the tiger with 68% of the vote. boom! how do you feel, neil. >> we're thinking mr. peanut is, like, a human, but he's still a vegetable. >> stephen: right. >> and tigers don't eat vegetable s. >> stephen: oh, so there's no appeal to even attack. >> exactly! >> stephen: nicely done, but too late. well, i sided with tony, and it's g-r-r-rratifying! for our next match-up, this is in your wheelhouse, we debated which is more inescapable, the supermassive black hole in the center of center of our galaxy or the obligation to be with family at the holidays. neil, you sided with the super massive black hole because you're a man of science and because you have not met my family. twitter said 65% family. ( applause )
i went two-for-two, neil. i kicked your degrasse. what say you? how do you feel, neil. >> i thought people would go with the fact that the black hole-- you could still, your family and then the black hole eats everybody, you see. so i thought that could still work as kind of a backdoor way for me to still win that one. >> stephen: your grandmother is not getting any younger. she just wants to see you one last time. budge over, neil. we've brought in another champion. please stay with us. it is time for us to be joined by my next worthy opponent. she is editor in chief of the "huffington post," your one-stop shop for politics, entertainment and what part of selena gomez we weren't supposed to see on the red carpet last night. give it up for the titan of traffic! the magistrate of click-bait! the greek who isn't meek! arianna huffington! ( cheers and applause )
mwa! darling. let's do this. arianna, thank you for being here. good to see you again. >> great to see you? >> stephen: now you're a champion debater. if i got this right, you were the captain of your debate team at cambridge university. >> right. but i'm not as good a debater as you. >> stephen: oh, really? >> not at all. >> stephen: i think you're a better debater as i am, and if you convince me i'm better, that means i won. >> no, no. i'm not as good, because you know what? since donald trump bragging is out, humility is in. >> stephen: oh, really? >> and, also, if i can beat expectations tonight, then i win. so, basically, if everybody expects you to be better but i turn out to be better, whether it's iowa, new hampshire, or "friday night fights," that's a game now. beating expectations.
>> stephen: you're low-balling yourself. >> definitely. >> stephen: let's do it. are you ready for the fights? >> ready. stephen: okay. our first one is literally a classic. it matches mozart with his magic flute against beethoven wielding a machete. let's go to the tale of the tape. starting with wolfgang amadeus mozart, 5'4", tipping the scales at 127 pounds, this prodigy was blessed with the ear of god and the fingers of an angel. strengths include: harpsichord-shredding arpeggios, the powderiest wig this side of the danube, and a magical flute that controls the thoughts and emotions of all who hear it and, let's say, shoots lasers. weaknesses include: died penniless, and the emotional baggage of a former child star. but this fight isn't done, done, done, done because his opponent is beethoven with a machete. coming in at 5'3" and 132 pounds, this machete maestro's strengths include: inexhaustible genius, the original resting
bitch face, and a chronic abdominal pain that led him to contemplate suicide. so he's got nothing to lose. weaknesses include: alcoholism inherited from his father, and he is deaf. okay arianna, mozart flute, beethoven machete. >> i am going with mozart. >> stephen: mozart. >> yes. as you said, beethoven was deaf, so this little old man wouldn't hear the flute coming. ( laughter ) on top of it, on top of it, he was suffering from jaundice, chronic hepatitis, cirrhosisis of the liver, inflammatory degeneration of the artery. >> stephen: that just proves beethoven can take the punishment and keep on coming. >> no, it basically proves as modern insurance companies would take it, existing conditions, and on tom of it, magic. i always go with magic. who would you go with?
you always go with harry potter. >> stephen: so mozart with the magic flute. >> stephen: here's where you're wrong. here's where you're wrong, cambridge. because the magic flute must be heard by its victim, beethoven's deaf, he is immune to the powers of the flute. machete to the neck, mozart goes down. >> here's why are you wrong. it's not about beethoven hearing the magic flute. it's about all the animals that mozart can get to surround beethoven and attack him. ( applause ). >> stephen: strong argument. strong argument. >> there's one more thing that's terribly important is the magic is a deceptively dangerous weapon because you can sharpen it and use it as a spear. and did you know that the firs first-- the first flute was actually made out of the bone of a bear's leg? >> stephen: so the first flute was made from a bear's leg? >> yes! >> stephen: well, the bear might come back for that flute. mozart better look out. >> don't forget, the flute has a laser. you said you put a lays nert flute.
>> stephen: it is laser flute. >> you have laser and it's magic -- >> thank you! >> stephen: okay, the poll is now live on twitter. go to @stephenathome and vote on the question "who would win in a fight, mozart with a magic flute or beethoven with a machete?" you make the call! next up, a question that has baffled philosophers for centuries: which is more joyful, that feeling you get when a coworker shows you a photo of their new baby or that feeling you get when you realize they forgot to charge you for the extra guac on your burrito? ( laughter ) let's go to the tale of the tape, starting with your coworker's baby picture. tipping the scales at eight pounds, four ounces, six megapixels. it seems important to them. strengths include: seeing a baby's adorable toothless smile, building intimacy with your coworker, and making cooing sounds proves you're not dead inside. weaknesses include: bringing up guilt about either your childlessness or your own parenting skills, the fact that you hardly know this person, and the weird feeling if you say anything stronger than "cute."
its opponent is not to be trifled with: free guacamole. coming in at three ounces-- five if you're lucky-- this super-condiment feels like your birthday and christmas teamed up to throw you a surprise party. strengths include: it's guacamole! and you didn't pay for it! weaknesses include: you won't feel a rush like this again for a long time and nothing else. arianna, what brings greater joy, officemate's offspring or keep on guacin' in the free world? what say you? >> hands down, the baby. here's the thing. i get the -- >> nobody's on your side. no one. no one's on your side. >> i have not made my case yet. the get the advantages of the free guacamole, but then the guilt comes in. what if they find me out? what if the poor guy or girl who forgot to charge me for the guacamole gets fired? and the ultimate fear-- what if i end up going to hell for that? >> there's nothing in the bible
that says you'll go to hell for guacamole theft. let me ask you this-- neil, you have to chime in on this one. >> it's the other five commandments moses dropped coming down from the mountain. >> stephen: what about this-- what if the baby is hideous? what if it's not a beautiful baby and you have to lie to the person, say it's cute. isn't a lie a sin and don't you go to hell for that? >> here's the thing, beauty, beauty, stephen, is in the eye of the beholder. >> stephen: but i get to say if the baby is ugly. >> i personally have never seen an ugly baby but i have seen plenty of ugly, brown guacamole. ( cheers and applause ). >> stephen: you gotta put the lemon juice in. you gotta put the lemon juice on. >> with neil here, we have science on our side gr you have science on your side? >> yes, two graduates from yale in 2012 came out and discovered that looking at baby photos and animal photos releases dopamine, a joy hormone in us. so basically, we have completely incontrovertible scientific
evidence that the baby beats the guacamole! >> stephen: another wait a second-- >> i have to add something. i have to add something. if you add up all the possible ways of being human, all combinations of the genome that would produce a human being, those of us who have ever been born are triefingly small fraction of the total number of humans who could have ever been born. so the fact that any single human is ever born is basically a scientific miracle. >> stephen: okay, but i'll counter that-- no, i will counter that with you didn't pay for the guacamole! hard to beat the free gauc. but you guys can hop on twitter to @stephenathome and cast your vote on the question, "which is more joyful, seeing a photo of a coworker's baby or free guac on your burrito?" the polls will close wednesday at midnight eastern. so let's get it on. we'll announce the results next time on... >> "friday night fights!" >> stephen: arianna huffington and neil degrasse tyson, everybody.
we'll be right back. thank you so much. ( cheers and applause ) ♪ ♪ fact. when emergency room doctors choose an otc pain reliever for their patients muscle, back and joint pain. the medicine in advil is their #1 choice. nothing is stronger on tough pain than advil. relief doesn't get any better than this. advil. ♪ ♪ ♪
everybody. my first guest tonight is an emmy-winning actor who stars in the upcoming hbo series, "vinyl." >> three boys. three boys, i can tell they'll be filling football stadiums. >> come orichie. >> where are we with the good rats? eventually, you're going to have to swallow, and when you do, i want to hear some good news. >> they ( coughs ) they went with warners. >> and you're here eating lunch? >> he needs sustenance, doesn't he? >> what he needs is to sign the next good rats like i'm ( bleep ) paying him to. >> stephen: please welcome bobby cannavale. ( cheers and applause )
>> that is the best band. >> stephen: aren't they an amazing band? >> they're the best. >> stephen: first of all, congratulations on "vinyl." i can't wait for it to start. this is my kind of show. >> thanks. >> stephen: but, also, thanks so much for dragging yourself here, because my understanding is you have not slept for three, four days, something like that? >> four days. i'm sorry i haven't shave gld it's fine. it's a rugged look. because you have a new baby. >> i had a baby on monday, yes. ( cheers and applause ). >> stephen: congratulations. how is the mother doing? how is the mother doing? >> you know, i didn't do anything. >> stephen: i know. >> i didn't do anything and i'm so tired. i think i've gained 28 pound since monday. i mean, i'm not kidding you. like, this jacket fit so well, like, last thursday. but i've been eating -- >> it's all water weight. it's all water weight. you're going to lose it. what's the baby's name. >> rocco.
>> stephen: rocco cannavale. that's night. named after saint rocco? >> actually, you know, patron saint of the sick. >> stephen: there's a saint rocco. >> yeah. >> stephen: there is, really? >> yeah. he took care of sick people. pretty sure. >> stephen: yeah. >> could be wrong. i'm tired. >> stephen: it kind of sound like the patron saint of prizefighters, too. >> totally, totally. or made guys, the patron saint of made guys. he was german, actually. he wasn't italian, this saint rocco. >> stephen: and the baby is doing well? >> the baby is doing great. >> stephen: is this your first child? >> this is my second child. i have a 20-year-old son. >> stephen: oh, wow. nice grouping. >> thank you. thanks, thanks. i just started getting sleep before this one came, so -- >> now, the series "vinyl" is about sort of the gritty, kind of wild 70s music scene. >> that's right. >> stephen: you're a promoter? >> no a guy who owns a record company. >> stephen: record company, okay. >> label, and he's owned this
label for some years, and it's 1973, and the label is in trouble. and he's-- he doesn't want to sell the label, so it's about him bringing this lawbl back to prominence. either he does that or he kills himself by doing too many drugs or both. >> stephen: there is no drug he could do that is more mind bending than having a brand new baby. >> that's true. >> stephen: and not sleeping for four days. >> that is true, man. >> stephen: you did this-- scorsese is the producer and directed the first episode. >> that's right. >> stephen: what was it like working with scorsese? was he a hero of yours? >> absolutely. i grew up wishing i could have been in those movies and it's sort of the next-best thing, here i am making a show with him, set in his time there, 1973. and i'm italian american, and that's like-- i grew up watching de niro in those movies and now, you know, the guy every time, every day we'd shoot he'd be like,un," i remember, bob, we were shooting "taxi driver--" and every day was something like that. it was a story about shooting
"taxi driver." and-- but i kept it cool, man. you know, sometimes i'm a little too cool. you know? i was always worried that i was taking up too much of his time. >> stephen: really? even though he's your director. >> but still, in between, he'd have me come over, "come over here and sit down and talk to me." i never wanted to over-extent my welcome. one day i was like-- i guess i said it too many times-- i said, "let me let you go." that's my thing to say. "marty, let me let you go." and finally he goes, "where are you going to let me go? i'm here shooting a movie? where do you gotta go? where do you gotta go that you can't stay here and talk to me?" >> stephen: did you confess. >> i said, "i don't want to annoy you." he said, "you're not annoying me. stay here." he just puts you in his pocket when you're working with him and he's very collaborative and it's just a dream come true. >> stephen: i understand
pacino was also a hero of yours. >> yeah i. >> stephen: you had a ritual you would do before you did a play? >> i've done a lot of theater and i just grew up, like, he was my idol. and every time i would go to the theater i would say this little mantra, "al's coming tonight. al's coming tonight. al's coming tonight." >> stephen: like into a mirror before you went on? >> no, just to myself on the train or walk -- >> to make yourself nervous? >> to up my game you know what i mean? i have to be good because al is going to be there. >> stephen: sure, sure. >> and he never came, you know. ( laughter ) then they sat me next to him at the tony awards. we were both nominated for the same award-- weird. and we were sitting next to each other, and i asked him if he'd come to the show, and i was like, ," you're my idol. i would love it if you came." and he was like, "i'm coming." and he came the next week. and we've been great friend. we made a movie together. i got to play his son. and we play cards together. and it's just a trip, man.
it's a -- >> can you relax around him? >> i mean, i can now. i can now. he's been-- he's just great. he's just a good friend. he gave me a diaper cake for the baby upon. ( laughter ) that's so sweet. >> stephen: i'm going to imagine that's nice. >> it was like a big cake made out of diapers "for your boy!" it was awesome. ( laughter ). >> stephen: i'm not sure who i want to hear more your scorsese or your pacino? >> yeah, man, i pinch myself every day. it's nuts, you know,. >> stephen: you do a lot of drugs in this series. >> yeah. >> stephen: there's a lot of cocaine being snorted. i'm going to assume that's prop cocaine. >> yeah. >> stephen: what are you using because-- what are you using when you snort this stuff? >> i could use some right now, you know. >> stephen: would you-- would you like some guacamole? because this will getue it's free, it's free guac.
it's free guac, bobby. >> this is why i don't fit in the suit. >> stephen: no, just chew, just chew. there's no hurry. just relax. just relax for a second. >> yeah. ( laughter ) >> stephen: well, bobby, i'm going to let you go. ( laughter ) ( applause ) thank you so much for being here. "vinyl" debuts sunday, february 14, at 9:00 p.m. on hbo. see it. we'll be right back. bobby cannavale, everybody! proof of less joint pain. and clearer skin. this is my body of proof that i can fight psoriatic arthritis with humira. humira works by targeting and helping to block a specific source of inflammation that contributes to both joint and skin symptoms. it's proven to help relieve pain, stop further joint damage and clear skin in many adults.
doctors have been prescribing humira for 10 years. humira can lower your ability to fight infections, including tuberculosis. serious, sometimes fatal infections and cancers, including lymphoma, have happened, as have blood, liver and nervous system problems, serious allergic reactions, and new or worsening heart failure. before treatment, get tested for tb. tell your doctor if you've been to areas where certain fungal infections are common, and if you've had tb, hepatitis b, are prone to infections, or have flu-like symptoms or sores. don't start humira if you have an infection. want more proof? ask your rheumatologist about humira. humira. this is my body of proof! sfx: rocket blasting off sfx: (countdown) 3, 2, 1 rocket what hand paired with even getmore lobster?ked, you get hungry. and you count the seconds until red lobster's lobsterfest is
back with the largest variety of lobster dishes of the year. like new dueling lobster tails with one tail stuffed with crab, and the other with langostino lobster mac-and-cheese, it's a party on a plate! and you know every bite of 'lobster lover's dream' lives up to its name. hey, eating is believing. so stop dreaming and start eating. buying smartphones for the whole family is expensive. not at t-mobile® for a limited time, check out our half off smartphone event. get one of our most popular smartphones, and get the second one at half price. hurry to t-mobile® and get new smartphones for your whole family today. ♪ ♪ ♪ adventures from $599, plus up to $300 to spend at sea.
( cheers and applause ) and, right there. and as a public service, i just want to remind you that you only have tomorrow-- saturday, which tomorrow is-- to get everything you need for the perfect super bowl party. you need a big screen tv comfy couches, a guy named phil, a football-shaped pretzel bowl, enough beer to fell a horse, and a horse with a drinking problem. but, most importantly, you've got to have the right snacks. and i got two words for you: chip and dip. exclamation point. to make sure you have your dip in a pile, we here at the "late show" have created a helpful how-to video full of dip tips. jim? >> chips, nature's tastiest triangle be they yellow corn, plu corn, potato, or pita, they're as close to food as anything in your super bowl spread. grab a sweaty handful-- wait a minute, where's the the dip? don't freak. we have dip to make you flip.
cheese cubes, those are for scares. turn them into a three-layer caseo. as the cheese cools, it forms a thick rubbery skin, that's the first layer, and the third layer is the bowl. this again, don't embarrass yourself. this is the super bowl, not the pro bowl. beef it up with grade-a sirloin. now, there's a dip that will go deep in your mouth. time out! you forgot the dip. or did you? crunch those babies up into a dippable crumble. it's 5% less shameful than drinking them straight from the bag. make sure to save one for dipping. mmm! now you're back in the game. looking for a low-fat tip-ternative. you already have one. just turn on the tap and let the flavor flow. mmm! soft and yielding. take a knee. why not spice things up with some salsa? why not? because salsa's not a ( bleep ) dip, cheryl.
don't drag down my party with that ( bleep ). snacks not in pawing distance in just strap a bowl to your cog's head and let the dip come to you. that's your m.v.p.-- your most valuable pooch. here's a trick your guests won't see coming. just fill the dip poll boll with chips and run a reverse. in american football, you can use your hands. have a great super bowl. and if you don't watch football, you can still savor these dips during a viewing of "the man in the iron mask,." this one will keep you guessing until the very end. it's super bowl of movies. have a great regular sunday. ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: we'll be right back with donny deutsch. ♪ ♪
the best tour of italy is the one you create. at olive garden. iand quit a lot,t the best tour of italy is the one you create. but ended up nowhere. now i use this. the nicoderm cq patch, with unique extended release technology, helps prevent the urge to smoke all day. i want this time to be my last time. that's why i choose nicoderm cq. ♪ under starry skies above. of miles, ♪ ♪ don't fence me in. ♪ let me fly any time, ♪ any airline that i love, ♪ don't fence me in. ♪ give me a mile and a half ♪ for every buck i spend. ♪ double my miles when the first year ends. ♪ ♪ no annual fees, ♪ no blackouts, ♪ let the fun begin. ♪ don't fence me in. get the discover it miles card.
>> great to be here. >> stephen: all right, now, as i said, you're the star of "donny!," usa comedy nairk. that's donnie with an exclamation point. >> that worked well for jeb, didn't it? >> stephen: you were the master of the ad game for decades, one of the biggest and most impressive firms out there-- >> i think you used "legend "in the introduction. let's stay with that. >> stephen: explain to me-- we've got the super bowl coming up this weekend, all the big ads, everybody wants to see them. how do ads work? like, where are you putting the hook in on me, on my braip, my heart, my gut, or right in the groin? how are you trying to get me? >> interestingly, you aim at different part but a great ad is no different than a great tv show or a great piece of poetry. it holds up a mirror to who you are and properties a brand as a value system. this is what this brand brand is
about. if you like it -- >> stephen: i'm not buying doritos. i'm buying a lifestyle. this sunday, a 30-second ad on the super bowl is $5 million. how do you as somebody who is plan ago you planned a lot of super bowl ads-- how do you get your five mill out of it? >> in this world today clearly you have to go on line. it's not just what happens. it's do you tease online. do you get thousands of impressions? do you get talked about on shows like this? in order to get the bang for the buck you have to go everywhere, so basically it's on utue, it's here, it's there. there is 100 million people watching it on the game but there are 60 million people. it's the same thing how do you get a bang for a buck. tv is a smaller part of the world we see. >> stephen: i didn't realize that. it's very kepressing. why did i take this gig, donnie? i don't understand. let's talk about some of the most famous super bowl ads of
all time. here's one that came out in 2000 which became very famous. this is the budweiser ad. >> hello? >> aarrgghh. >> ha-ha-ha. >> so what's up? >> watching the game, having a bud. >> true. true. >> that was great. >> stephen: so, what was different about that? why did that make such an impact? >> two reasons. some something climbs into the culture-- here you have an ad and all of a sudden everything's going, "what's up?" they brought it back to the brand. it's about guys watching the game, talking on the phone, drinking a bud. you not only have to break through and make it part of the but culture but you have to bring it back to the brand. to this day you can go, "what's up?" actually, you can't. >> stephen: this is from your company, the most popular ad by far four years ago or five years ago, in 2011. this is for volkswagen.
♪ ♪ ( dog barking ) ( laughter ) ( applause ) >> stephen: i will buy that child anything! i would buy that child anything? now why, why, tell me about that ad and explain to me why is that ad one tha i just-- it's so appealing to me? >> i think the best ads over time are simple help stories that we can all relate to. wow. i love the way they approach that kid.
you bring in a piece of popular cult wur "star wars" but sometimes it's so human and hits you-- it's interesting you talked about it. it hits you in the heart. i like a company that brings me an ad like that. i like volkswagen. >> stephen: i thought you were going to say i like a company that brings an ad like that. of course, it's your company. you're out of the game, you're owcht ad game. it's super bowl sunday, the super bowl of ads. do you wish you were still in the game? do you have that hunger? do you want to go out there and sell me some chips? >> no, to tell you the truth, i like being a tv star a lot more, and having a sitcom on usa. it's more pun fun than dealing with clients -- no, i do miss it. advertising is something we all get to participate in -- >> we have no choice. >> we have a choice. >> stephen: we don't get to. they're selling adspace on the inside of my eye liz at this point. >> i'm not buying your product, that's a choice. we vote artistically in the way we spend money. basically, i like your ad, i buy
your product-- it's not as simple as that. it's the actual one art form that we all participate in. it sounds very prolific. it's just ads! it's just selling stuff. >> stephen: donnie, i'm going to let you go. >> stephen: you can see "donny!" on demand on www.usanetwork.com. donny deutsch, everybody! we'll be right back. ♪ only kraft natural cheese has a touch of philadelphia cream cheese, so whatever you make, is creamier than ever. ♪ ♪ ♪ never underestimate the power of energizer. our longest lasting energizer max ever. you'd do that for me? really? yeah i'd like that.
who are you talking to? uh, it's jake from state farm. sounds like a really good deal. jake from state farm, at three in the morning? who is this? it's jake from state farm. what are you wearing jake from state farm? uh, khakis. she sounds hideous. well, she's a guy so... another reason more people stay with state farm. get to a better state. puplumpify your lashes with new plumpify mascara a ginormous lash lifting brush boosts lashes to 50 times the volume and lifts lashes up up and away... new plumpify mascara from easy breezy beautiful covergirl and try new trunaked shadows and liners sfx: knocks on door. oh my gosh, stephanie we're, honey?so goth.
i'm dying my hair, mom. hair dye? honey... it's just purple. teenage daughter? get scrubbing bubbles. kill 99.9% of germs and destroy grime. with scrubbing bubbles for 100% problem solved. they say denny's 7-pepper sbut how crazy could it be... denny's new crazy spicy skillet. denny's. welcome to america's diner. announcer: cbs monday, february 15, witness greatness at the grammys with once-in-a-lifetime performances by: plus: and say "hello" when world superstar adele returnsto the grammy stage. ♪ hello from the other side...
♪ don't miss the,,,,,,,, ♪ ♪ ba da ba ba ba ♪ buying smartphones for the whole family is expensive. not at t-mobile® for a limited time, check out our half off smartphone event. get one of our most popular smartphones, and get the second one at half price. hurry to t-mobile® and get new smartphones for your whole family today. if you could see your cough, you'd see just how far it can spread. robitussin dm max soothes your throat and delivers fast, powerful cough relief. robitussin dm max. because it's never just a cough.
announcement: thisbiggest of the decade.the with total accumulation of up to three feet. roads will be shut down indefinitely. and schools are closed. campbell's soups go great with a cold and a nice red. made for real, real life. are just $6 each. the media is going a little crazy. "sub-mageddon" with an incredible amount of accumulation inside... that now seems... enjoy all our classic footlongs for just $6 each.
here performing his grammy-nominated song, "the driver," ladies and gentlemen, please welcome charles kelley! ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm the driver, bringing their circus to town ♪ first one in and the last rolling out ♪ shutting down the up all-nighter ♪ all the stars and sunrises i've seen ♪ every corn field and town in between ♪ west to east
oh, easy come, easy go ♪ yeah we rock then we roll out of town ♪ but for now while the moment is here ♪ shine a light, drink a beer let's get loud ♪ all the drivers and dreamers believers and singers ♪ oh, won't you sing with me now? ♪ oh, oh, whoa, oh oh, oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ i'm the dreamer soaking up every line ♪ searching for truth all the time ♪ oh, yeah the believer
♪ that music can save a soul the one who's at every show ♪ in the front row singin' ♪ oh, easy come easy go, yeah, we rock ♪ then we roll out of town but for now ♪ while the moment is here shine a light, drink a beer ♪ let's get loud all the drivers and dreamers ♪ believers and singers oh, won't you sing with me now? ♪ oh, oh, whoa, oh oh, oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ i'm the singer pouring out all that i had ♪ every love song and heart break gone bad ♪ and looking back when i was younger ♪ sitting right there where you are ♪ sending a prayer to the highest star ♪ and here we are oh, here we are ♪ oh, easy come, easy go yeah, we rock ♪ then we roll out of town but for now
♪ while the moment is here shine a light, drink a beer ♪ let's get loud the drivers and dreamers ♪ believers and singers oh, won't you sing with me now? ♪ oh, oh, whoa, oh oh, oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ oh, oh, whoa, oh oh, oh-oh, oh, oh, oh ( cheers and applause ) >> stephen: his album, "the driver" is out today! charles kelley, everybody! we'll be right back.,,,,,,,,,,,,
>> stephen: that's it for "the late show." be sure to tune in this sunday after the super bowl for our live post-game special. i will have tina fey, margot robbie, will ferrell, key and peele, and megan kelly. good night! captioning sponsored by cbs captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> james: good evening, everyone. in 2002 i traveled three hours out of london to see a band perform to a few hundred people at the bath pavilions. it was an incredible gig and they rapidly became my favorite band. it blows my mind that they're here to kick off "the late late show" tonight. here performing "adventure of a lifetime," it's coldplay!